#cassandra-fish-confessional

, so I don't know what to do. I'm gonna die. I know I'm gonna die, because this merge is really just hellish for me. Like, okay, so I have my little group with Riley and Ale, and I think that's beautiful. I think that's the perfect group. but 3 and 11 is not gonna get me nowhere okay we have Carly and I love Carly but I don't think she loves me so that definitely is like a huge block um who are the other people Dallas I don't I don't fuck with Dallas I don't message Dallas I don't like Dallas so I don't work with them I will never work with them, I just can't. Missouri, I actually do like Missouri, but, like, they give, I don't, it just, it's so fake, it's just fake and gay, and I don't know, I just, I'm not, no, I just, no. The new tribe, I feel like all the vets are working together, and I, like, I don't, I don't even know, like, there's no reason all three of them should have made merch, all of them were on the same tribe, and they voted off EMP, and I'm pissed, and who's the other one Is it Garrett I think that their uh they were not giving me the energy in mayday so i don with them aka i just find annoying but like uh i gonna have to work with them but if emp went i feel like they flipped because there was supposed to be an apple group and i don't know like i don't know um snubs i actually do enjoy working with snubs but i was on vc with the rest rest of my life the other day and they were saying how they find snubs annoying so they want to work with him and i'm just like and i'm just because we like you're gonna have to suck it up and have to work with these people i'm sorry so as much as i'm loyal to them i we need snubs vote so i'm gonna try to kiss ass to them because i think that's the only chance i can get a lick of intel of what happened at the what was it orange orange group um since it's merged i actually kind of need to turn up my game instead of doing whatever the fuck i want because lately i've just been doing like whatever i check in on m

 daily i do my i do my whatever i the confessionals dry as hell but also i just i fear the moles um what else is there to add like i just I don't, I'm gonna be the first merge boot, I just know it, I don't, there's nothing I can do about it, I don't have an idol, I don't have blocking votes, I don't have bells for advantages, like, I just, I'm, I'm dead.

'm on the bottom I'm on the bottom and I always knew that this was going to happen I'm on the bottom I always end up being on the bottom I wasn't on the right side of the vote I'm on the bottom and I don't know what to do because like whenever I'm on the bottom and my allies don't trust me and everyone else doesn't trust me and I'm just low on everyone's priority list and that means I'm on the bottom because I'm at the bottom of everything so I'm just on the bottom and I don't know what to do because I really struggle when I play from the bottom

 okay that freaking blindside dude like I it got me all the way fucked up okay like I mean I can't I did once well actually no I'm kind of lying I know my alliance sound snubs annoying and like I guess sometimes he can be annoying but he's he's really just a lovely spirit he was so happy to be here he just wanted to play Everest and like I don't know I don't think he deserves the hate and I really wanted to work with him and he was the person I trusted most like outside of the people that I've been to and I don't know and I'm just like I'm sad and like I don't know I don't know how to put it um wait what was I going to talk about hold on I'll get back to you

 tribal genuinely awoke something in me, like, I was here, like, I was just playing, you know, I was having fun, I was doing my own thing, I check in once a day, you know, say hi to my people, say hi to my not-so-people, and, you know, I was just here to have fun, that tribal changed my trajectory, like, I don't give a fuck how the rest of this game goes, I will play until I burn the fuck out I am livid I'm genuinely so pissed at how that tribal went we wasted two of our advantages on our side we lost an ally and it's just like we just look dumb we just look dumb I don't know what else to say and I'm genuinely irritated because what fucking Carly like she sided with the bitches that were gonna vote her out every single person in this game was gonna vote her out but we didn't because everyone saved their vote and snubs with one of the people that kept her and she still voted her out because carly is a dumb ass and i just or i had to clear my throat and i don't know what the hell this girl was thinking because like i know the um apple cherries me ale and the other one riley yeah like we saved her like she was going to go home. She was going to go home on May Day. She was going to go home when we went to travel and she still has the audacity to flip. Like what the hell is her problem?

, like, after this, like, I, like, I can't, I just can't do it, I can't do this game anymore, where I just sit around, and I'm kind and friendly to everyone, and pretending to be everyone's bestie, and just, like, being inactive, and not doing shit, and just sitting on my ass, twiddling with a thumb up my butt, I'm not doing that no more, that's not the game I'm going to play, I need to actually do shit, I mean, I don't really think I have a case to win, I mean, maybe if I turn it up, and have an ass final three, maybe I can win. I don't know. But I don't want to sit idly by and let this shit happen. I will not be on the bottom. I am a fighter. I am not a quitter, okay? So if they think for a second that they can keep me down, I will rise up. I will find a way, okay?

, so first thing, I'm gonna win this immunity, okay? I'm just gonna say it right here, right now, I will be winning this immunity. Um, the Mayday challenge, I was first runner-up. This past immunity, I was first runner-up, so I'm like, okay, I just. And with the tribe challenges, I'm also, like, usually one who puts in a good chunk of effort, minus, like, the first few ones, because I didn't know what the hell I was doing. But, like, I'm okay, like, okay, like, I'm okay. So, I'm, I'm, I will be winning this challenge, okay? and I, like, it gives me, if I'm immune, I have the comfortability to do whatever the fuck I want, and know that I will be here tomorrow, okay, because I will be, I will, like, I will be here, I'm sorry, like, they can get all, they can be mad, they can do whatever the hell they want, like, I already know that they were planning to vote me at one point in time, but my vote record is still zero, okay, I, I, I,

, we're at final 10, and... Wait, I'm gonna need to cast a list real quick before I go further, because I lowkey don't

, first and foremost, I will be ending my fucking bitch Dallas, I hate that man, I cannot stand him with a fiber in my being, he just sits there and expects things to go, not too much, but like, I just, his one-on-ones after the Chris O blindside has pissed me the fuck off, he's ignored me all the way till Merge, and in Merge, even then, he's still not, like, giving me anything to work with and i'm just and i'm just so i i will be ending my off bitch dallas i'm gonna get ak and carly myself briley um i can't get missouri because missouri's fat i don't really know where reesey or tully stand garrett i just tried voting the bitch out but like i'm gonna try i'm gonna try and worst case i buy some something from the shop that'll help me I just have my bells I can't just be sitting there I'm still anticipating there's going to be some twist of some sort but anyway Dallas will be going home this round I will find a way I will blow up however many games I need to I will waste how many other bells or advantages I got Dallas is going home this week

 mean, won't my allies, like, my allies have seen me just, like, you know, check in, say hi, do my little one-two-one-two, just, like, you know, like, I'm just kind of there, I'm just here for the ride, I will force them to vote Dallas, I know Riley is already down, like, she's already willing, I don't really know where LA stands, and that's, like, I'm, like, okay, like, I'm just, like, I'm okay, I'm just, because, I mean, like, honestly, you could really delude him into anything, thinking that, um, he ran a vote for some reason he keeps claiming that he ran the chris o vote and i'm just like what like okay i'm okay i'm a girl okay i just don't fathom how you think you ran chris o going home you said you wanted missouri gone and me and riley had to push you to vote chris o and all of sudden now it's your move bitch please but like i love him though so i could know too much and i would say this to his face because i will like i i have said it to his face like i am literal but like he just needs to be humble and like i just um he will be voting dallas tonight and i will not be accepting no for an answer or or if not i will find a way for his ass to go home uh I don't know like I just I need to talk to this girl Carly like

 so for these next few rounds because i am a fighter not a quitter and i need to get out from the bottom i am gonna have to suck major dick to these people and aka i've found annoying at the beginning of the game but i've actually kind of grown to like them over time so i'm just like i'm okay i can work with you carly i hate hate hate that purple haired mole i just can't stand her but I'm gonna try. Delos is my off bitch. I'm gonna block him after this. Garrett, why are you 28 playing orgs? I'm not trying to be that person. I mean, I know I'm like tied for the youngest person on the cast. Wait. I am the youngest person on the cast. Okay. And like, that is okay. Like, I'm content being at a humble 17, but if you are 28, and you doing orgs and being active? I just... I'm not trying to be the person that's, like, shaming adults when I'm, like, I'm just here. But, like, I just... It's my opinion. I'm just... Okay.

'm a Missouri, Missouri not Mountain Dallas, but I might as well still try to get good with them. Like I just, I don't like they're, they're actually a nice person to talk to. I hate to admit, but I also know that it's all social game botting. And so I'm like, I don't really care. Honestly, I've made up so many lies about myself in small talk this season. I'm really not that. What was I saying?

'm not one for small talk like I don't want to be like that annoying person but like if I could be in an org where everyone just game bots like I would have so much fun I really really love like when it's just a bunch of messy tribals like that's my favorite thing in the world um Recy I think I liked Recy I think like I don't really know I haven't really talked to them that much, to my knowledge, I think I like them, like, I'm a just, like, I'm a just, I'm a just, you know, so I think I can work with them, I'm already good with Riley, and so I just, Thule, I actually enjoy Thule, I mean, we have our little talks about Taylor Swift, and I'm like, I don't really listen to her that much anymore, but like, you know, I know a thing or two, I know a thing or two, and so I can really get a conversation going with that, and so like, I'm just, I feel like, I don't know. I feel like if I put in the effort, I am not at the bottom of the bottoms. Like, I'm not taking major dick, but I still have, like, a butt plug or two. So, I don't think I'm going to be, like, in an outstanding position. But that's okay. Everything takes time. Everything's patience. I just need to make sure that I end my aw, bitch Dallas first.

, there's probably more I can talk about, but everything's kind of skipping the mind right now. I'm not really thinking straight. I don't know. So I'm going to go give my girls a pep talk in the... I don't know the Alliance name, but it's the one with AK. I think it's just the old apples, but I don't really know the name. Anyway, I think you guys have access to that, so follow me there. I just...

, I don't know what just happened. Sorry, my mic quality might be ass right now. I have my AirPod in, but I need to give one last update because I have to do some socializing before I go to bed. And I am going to have to keep my cool when talking to this girl, Carly. Like, I don't want to kill her right now. I already talked about it, like, a few voice moments ago, but, like, it's going to be so hard for me to keep my cool with this girl. I'm going to try. I'll try.

, okay, I'm in the car. And so basically, hold on. So my thoughts right now in the game, I'm like, I think my positioning is weirdly good. I don't know, maybe I'm being played by Recy and Garrett. it but like i feel like i have the most connection with them out of anyone in my alliance i wouldn't be shocked if ale does because he's always he's always had a good social game but the thing is his threat level management is ass so i'm like okay and i i think with i need to turn on him with these next few tribals i was really really hoping he would go last tribal that's why i didn't vote, because he felt convinced he was the vote, which I really don't, I still don't know where that came from, and I, like, I wanted him to go, because that way it would give me good raps with Thule and Garrett and Reecey, and, but, like, I'm just, like, whatever, so I feel good with those two, I feel good with my alliance, um, I, like, obviously my threat level is low solely because I haven't really done much of anything. I mean, I'd like to take credit for the Chris O vote but Aile and Riley are both also taking credit for it So I just like okay like I just um I still have zero votes against me I think that lovely I mean there still quite a few people who have that luxury but like I it's nice to have it's nice to have um hold on okay I I still have all my advantages like A lot of people are getting spooked and playing in another advantage so that way they can get their will. And I have full mind. Everything I've bought, I've just been able to hold on to. My two golden slingshots and my axe. I think the slingshots are low-key kind of useless since the good of the big advantages are gone. But we are still missing the golden shovels. Neither of them have turned up. And also Tully and Garrett have not played any advantages. so I'm like that's perfect for me so I'ma just steal them both times I'm assuming they expire at oh shit they probably expire soon because it negates 6 votes okay w

 I think it's 6 so oh shit they're gonna probably be played really really soon now so I'm gonna eat but I don't know if I want to steal them though if I'm aligned with the two of them I don't know I'll figure that out let me record another one because it's going to be too long

 secondly um well what was I talking about I I'm trying I mean Carly is like sheepy so like I'm just like she she just be there like I don't know I don't really know what Carly right she kind of just does whatever the hell she wants and like I'm just but I feel like if she stays in later I feel like it would be a logical decision for her to ally with me. I don't think she would because she's kind of dumb, but I don't know. I feel really, really great on my chances of getting out Dallas this round. I think that would be really, really beautiful. Let me think. Getting out Dallas would be good because obviously I have my little vendetta against Dallas. I don't that's kind of mainly the real reason I want him out but also like according to Lee and Garrett no not Lee and Garrett Recy and Garrett she planning on she no Dallas Oman he planning on stonewalling us and I like okay because I already do that to him um I Don't know. My only thing is misery like okay if I had a dream boot order it would be at Wait, we're at night now nine ale No nine Dallas eight ale seven I still don't know everyone left in the game there's another one of them 7 Missouri 6 Reese 5 Riley 4 Garrett and then the final 3 would be me, Carly and AK I think I beat Carly it depends AK I think I can beat it depends on what I do from here on out but if it's a final two I'm taking Carly to the end no matter what cause she's just like she'd just be there um it's kind of all my thoughts right now I don't know I'll update if anything comes to mind

 don't know, my mic quality might be right now because I'm using it. But anyway, so my plan is Ayo told me that the card would be either between me or AK. And they went for AK last round and if they're trying not to be predictable I wouldn't be sure if they go for me. So I'm probably what I want to do is I want to bring Ayo's trouble and play it on myself. because I don't, they all have three a sharpie and I hate not getting any votes. The last thing I want to do is build my number one L. But what I want to make sure I get to be able to do is get another move. I still have zero votes passed against me, so if I can keep that up, I'm going to I need Carly and AK to vote with me. If they don't, it might still end up being 2-1 against me, which is, they might play about the steal. I'm hoping to get that done. I don't know. I'm low-key playing on a day-by-day basis right now, but that's where my head's at right now. I'll keep y'all updated.

-key, I've kind of accepted my chances at not winning this game, but I want to make sure it's my friend who wins the game. So I think for these next few rounds, I'm just going to try to burn the jury as much as possible to ensure the fact that I do make final tribal council and that I am a losing finalist. And I know that sounds like a bad strategy, and it probably is. And I'm guessing it's a really really bad strategy if i'm a current jury favorite right now but i don't think i am and also like i just want to see my friends and win like i just love my friends

, now that I'm thinking about it, I feel like, theoretically, if I were to cut A.L. at four, I think I win. Like, because I think A.L. roots for me on the jury. And who, Carly's going to beat me? AK's going to beat me? The people who flipped to flip back immediately and then got votes on them? Girl. I don't know. I think if I were to cut Ale I could really genuinely win this however I don't know if I have it in me to do that like I mean at the end of the day I want one of the two of us to win but it's like I don't think I like I want Ale to win like I started like I was playing this game at the beginning for him to win like I don't know I'm just gonna do this comp and then I'll decide what I want to do later Thank you.

 like fuck that bitch Ayo voting out or trying to vote out Carly like that and then not saying anything like Carly's her sister like what the hell Michelle like ugh that pisses me off like I'm actually gonna try at final general council now slowly to piss him off

, fucks- that Final Tribal Council was so ass, like I actually hated that speech, like it could have been 20 times better But like I'm just so hungry and tired of this shit like I'm ready

 either I was a jury fave or I did Final Tribal Council really well, because I do not think that I should be getting the support that I've been getting, or I feel like I've been getting. I feel like I might actually get, like, two votes, which is not what I expected. So I think that'd be beautiful. But also, like, I don't know. Like, I... Okay. Okay.